Thursday, July 19, 2012

Friends

My friend Tom Sterbutzel called me out of the blue yesterday.  Tom is my oldest friend, the one I've known the longest.  We met in first grade but became chums in second or third grade on account of our fathers' being friends.  I call him Sterbz.  He calls me Skooch (don't ask).  Over the years we got closer, going off to boarding schools in NE together around the same time and hanging out in the summers.  We weren't inseparable though.  It was more like we had our separate circles but still connected and would catch up on the next flip side, when-ever and where-ever that was. Tom was best man in my wedding, a support through its breakup and is godfather to my son Luke.

Jughead51 rocking the Paisley, 3rd grade,'72
Talking with Tom yesterday I was thinking that has been a long time since we met.  This tune will give you a hint as to just how long.  It was on the FM pretty hard around that time and I posted this video, not JUST because of the 70's psychedelics or the 'groovy' revolving graphics resplendent of bike rims, but because it represents the era in which Sturbz and I met.


I have a couple of other friends I've known a really long time too.  You could say they're my 'oldest' and best friends.  I truly appreciate the few friends I have like this.  Its rare that separate paths of individuals intersect with one another throughout an entire lifetime.  Over a span of time this long many challenging experiences happen and actualize in our lives that can break the bonds of friendship but it's the awareness and support throughout these things that provide the stuff needed to cultivate meaningful ground and lasting ties between two people.  Friendships like this are special and the exception rather than the rule.

It's okay to have acquaintance friendships too though.  They last a while then you part ways, which isn't always the greatest thing, but it's a part of life and I think there's a place for both levels of friendship.

I also think it's important to be by yourself once in a while without friends around.  It's during these times that you can befriend yourself and hone insights around self clarity. Having said that, I don't think anyone should be alone for too long.  We need friends.  Solitude heals, loneliness kills.       Peace and roll strong.

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